Fall is such a symbolic season. The leaves fall, the air shifts, and change becomes visible everywhere. And here’s the mystery of fall: pain becomes pride, which leads to destruction. That’s where we fall.
We’ve all fallen short, but it’s also true—it’s your time to get back up.
The Cycle of Pain
What’s mind-boggling is how people unknowingly become like the very people who hurt them.
Many of us grew up in homes where pain was passed down like an heirloom. Adults consumed by their own anger, irritation, fear, or sadness transmitted it without even realizing it.
Some of you know what it feels like to be the punching bag, the child confidant, or the one carrying the heavy load of perfectionism.
Perfectionism is that constant pressure to be flawless—to hide mistakes, to perform for applause, to avoid rejection at all costs. It robs you of peace and replaces love with criticism. It creates an unsafe emotional environment, where grace and redemption are strangers.
If you didn’t measure up, you were met with silence, shame, or the cold shoulder.
The Mindset That Follows Us
You can leave your childhood home, but that doesn’t mean the mindset leaves you. Memories cling. Triggers remain. When circumstances or words mirror the pain or hypocrisy we’ve witnessed, we can get stuck in those old wounds.
Pain becomes the lens we look through.
It becomes the idol we unknowingly worship.
It directs our relationships, our choices, and even our faith.
We start looking for people who validate our pain more than those who push us toward our purpose. We trauma bond. We hold grudges. We complain silently or lash out, not realizing that we’ve stepped into the same cycle of dehumanization.
A Confession
I’m not writing this from a pedestal. I’m not perfect. I am flawed. I’ve judged and been judged. I’ve made mistakes, and I’ve had to ask for forgiveness when my hurt shaped the way I showed up.
But here’s the key: I refuse to remain there.
Choosing a Different Path
What always helps me heal is remembering that I was never meant to remain:
- In the past
- In my mistakes
- In pride
- In the projections of how others see me
- Stuck in my emotions
Instead, I lean into the presence of God. His peace stabilizes me. His picture of me becomes the image I conform to.
When I do, I see myself as precious and pure in His sight—human again. But I also see the superhuman side of me when led by His Spirit.
That’s when I can love from a place of wholeness, rather than react from offense.
One path leads to momentum and peace.
The other leads to misery and pain.
Your Turn to Rise
Fall reminds us of what drops away, but also what makes room for new growth. Don’t stay stuck in what hurt you. Allow yourself to heal. Become who God has called you to be.
When you do, you’ll rise again—with love, purpose, and power.
Fam, it’s your season to move forward. To fall into His arms and get back up stronger.
With love,
Miriam
👉 Watch my short video on this topic: The Mystery of the Fall Season
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